AND THE SEA WILL SWALLOW YOU WHOLE

my heart is as heavy as my schoolbag and the guilt from yet-to-be-forged test papers. these days slipping into my depression is as easy as sleeping into my problems. look on the bright side they say, so i do. my australian friend sleeps six hours on a regular basis but here in singapore i sleep four hours. (three in the morning and one in lectures because my eyes are weighed down by the weariness bore from days of juggling a test every other day. my stomach churns like the sea deranged, slosh slosh slosh and i have to press my lips together lest oceans pour out of my eyes and rivers up my parched throat.) dreaming is a foreign concept but when i do i see quiet, hear the way the sky is blue and the grass, green, and i can feel the sweetness in the air and taste the joy in my heart.

when i come to, my pillow is damp.

i plunge headfirst into schoolwork.

THREE DAYS TO CURE MY PERENNIAL DEPRESSION

it has been scientifically proven that long weekends can produce Happier and Healthier citizens. who knew that the cure to my crippling depression would be to reduce my weekly jail sentence?

three day weekends are glorious beach days under the sun, ice cream cone in hand and fash mags in the other. it ends the way we all know: you fuss over the calories in your ice cream, it drips all over your fash mags (this season craziest trend: rihanna’s jelly slides that my late grandma wore to the market!) and you go home with a sunburn with sand between your toes. in other words, great, because when are beach days not the best days?

three days weekend means more sleep and god knows i need that. not that he ever grants my wishes, so here i am, an atheist molded by easy lies about catching up with work and hanging out with my girlfriends and mental health recovery so i don’t break down in school (which then induces mental breakdowns, and is so kind as to offer me three day weekends, and i am so so so grateful).

three days weekends means that the bitch next to me swallows me whole because this is a dog eat dog world and i am the runt of the litter. waking up at  10 everyday means i lose three hours of revision. multiply that by three days and i’ve had nine hours lesser to get work done. tragically that equates to me scoring straight Ds like the dumb freak i am because that nine hours would really have helped me master the seven chapters i have no clue about.

hey mr prime minister, maybe you’d like to strip me of my A star Asian identity and force me to take an off day, no whatsapp check allowed? after five months you’ll see smarter kids and hea-just kidding, time and tide waits for no small country in the world.

back to the books again. after all, chemistry is effective for mental health days.

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inspo: why the hell do we pay scientists when we don’t bloody listen to them?

answers to my prayers: don’t humans do everything for the Aesthetics?